Recognizing Early Signs of Autism Through Sleep Challenges in Infants and Toddlers

Parenting is a journey filled with discoveries, joys, and challenges. One area that left me searching for answers was sleep. Every baby is unique, but for some, sleep struggles may go beyond the typical adjustment period. For me, navigating my daughter Nora’s early sleep challenges turned out to be a reflection of how she experiences the world differently.

Before I go on, I want to emphasize that I’m not a doctor. This is a personal story about my experiences as a mom, along with some reflections and things I’ve learned along the way. If you’re concerned about your child’s development, I encourage you to consult a pediatrician or developmental specialist for professional guidance.

Nora's Story: A Journey Through Sleepless Nights

From the moment Nora was born, I noticed she struggled to sleep unless held. All babies are this way in the beginning. However, eventually this became more extensive of a need than most. Despite trying every method I could find—from dozens of different swaddle options to carefully curated crib setups—she would wake immediately after being put down. For many months this was the case. Eventually, I gave up trying to lay her down altogether and turned to contact naps as a necessity, spending hours with her either cradled on the couch or snugly secured in a baby carrier.

Straight from the womb, Nora needed a lot more stimulation to help her fall asleep. Twinkle lights, shiny objects like crystals, and necklaces became part of our nightly ritual to relax her. I even discovered that covering her eyes helped her settle—a specific sensory preference that required perfect timing and consistency to avoid meltdowns.

Routine was everything for Nora. If we went out and her routine was disrupted, she would cry inconsolably and refuse to sleep, no matter how exhausted she was. At the time, I chalked this up to high sensitivity. It wasn’t until I spent time with other babies her age that I realized how different her sleep needs were. While another baby would drift off with just a little rocking, Nora’s extensive needs for motion and sensory input far surpassed what seemed typical.

In those early months, co-sleeping became the only way for any of us to get rest. I was paranoid about safety, so I slept without blankets or pillows on the bed, while my husband, Trav, slept on the couch. Eventually, we set up a separate room for him to ensure Nora and I had a safe sleeping arrangement.

When Nora was about 10 months old, I began transitioning her to a pack-and-play for naps. This was a significant milestone, but it took time. I watched countless gentle sleep training videos and broke the process into small, manageable steps. First, I would lay her down while keeping a hand on her. Over time, I would gradually move further away, eventually working my way to the door. Each stage took much longer than the videos suggested, but with patience, it worked.

At night, Nora still needed me close. I slept next to her on a floor bed to give her the freedom to roll around and kick against soft walls, bouncing off them again and again as a way to put herself to sleep. This setup worked well until she was about 21 months old. However, as we are now in this stage, her sleep challenges have begun to evolve once again, along with an uptick in seperation anxiety and sensory needs.

Sleep Challenges and Early Autism Indicators

For many families, sleep difficulties are an expected part of parenting. However, when sleep issues are coupled with unique sensory needs and rigid routines, they may indicate early signs of autism. Here are some patterns I’ve noticed and learned about:

1. Heightened Sensory Needs

Nora’s story highlights the need for sensory stimulation to fall asleep. Babies who require specific textures, lights, or sounds may be signaling unique sensory processing needs. Conversely, some children are extremely sensitive to sensory input and may struggle to settle in typical environments.

2. Difficulty Transitioning

Infants and toddlers with autism may resist transitions, such as moving from being held to lying down. Routines can become crucial, and even minor changes can lead to distress and disrupted sleep.

3. Reliance on Routines

Nora needed a highly structured bedtime routine, from specific stimuli to carefully timed steps. While routines are beneficial for most children, an unusually intense reliance on them may signal neurodivergence.

4. Sleep Disturbances and Separation Anxiety

Many toddlers experience separation anxiety, but for children with autism, this anxiety can be more pronounced and persist longer. Frequent night wakings or difficulty resettling can also signal an underlying difference in how their brain processes sleep cycles.

Strategies That Worked for Us

If you’re facing similar struggles, here are some strategies that have helped me support Nora’s sleep and overall well-being:

1. Meet Sensory Needs Before Bed

Sensory activities can help children regulate before bedtime. For Nora, calming sensory input like gentle swaying, weighted blankets (once over 15m of age and with appropriate weight ONLY, do some research before going this route,) and timing lighting in the house to dim before bed and get much softer made a big difference.

2. Establish a Consistent Routine

A predictable bedtime routine helped signal to Nora that it was time to wind down. This included a either pillow rolling around in her room without any toys except stuffed animals, a bath, or quiet play with dim lighting, and 3 stories before bed. She likes certain lights to tell her what we are doing when. Such as a candle light for "Reading" time and the soft table light turning off before laying her down.

3. Create an Ideal Sleep Environment

Nora benefited from a dark, quiet space with minimal distractions. Tools like blackout curtains and a white noise machine (not too loud) helped her relax. Also, keeping the room cooler helps.

4. Be Patient with Transitions

Gradual steps, such as moving from co-sleeping to independent sleep, helped Nora adjust at her own pace. It took longer than the methods I found online suggested, but it worked for us.

5. Seek Professional Guidance

If sleep remains a persistent challenge, consulting a pediatrician or developmental specialist can provide valuable insights. Early intervention can make a big difference.

Reflecting on Our Journey

Looking back, I realize how much Nora’s sleep challenges taught me about her unique needs. At the time, I didn’t understand that these differences were early signs of autism. Recognizing these patterns has helped me support her more effectively and embrace her beautiful, unique way of experiencing the world.

If you’re a parent navigating similar challenges, I hope our story offers some comfort and guidance. Every child’s sleep journey is unique, and finding what works for your family takes time and patience. Above all, remember that you’re not alone. By learning to understand and support your child’s needs, you’re taking meaningful steps toward helping them thrive.

Thanks for Reading!

Until Next Time...Keep On Shinning!